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Thread: An ode to beaters

  1. #1
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    An ode to beaters

    This is a story I first "published" about 10 years ago on the GTAMC forum. I recently came across it in ym files and I thought I'd re-present it..

    Last year (2009) I bought 2 beaters for winter driving. The first is a 93 Dodge Spirit that we saw on the side of the road in Port Perry. I paid $500 for it, then had Rick (ZR50) fix it up and certify it.
    Aside from some occasional stumbling and new wheel bearings, it has run fine. Eventually, it would only run with a lot of "persuasion"so I sold it. For $500.00
    The second beater is a 93 Dodge Shadow. We bought it for $300 from an add in Kijiji.
    Again, Rick massaged it and we drove it all winter. Apart from a new muffler and new rear springs (and a tune up), we’ve put 17,000 km on it, and it’s been trouble free. (Update: I kept it another 2 years and put almost 30,000 km on it, but it was getting too dinged up, so I "retired" it to the junkyard, where they paid me $200 for it.)
    These are the first used cars I’ve bought since 1979 when we had a 72 Gremlin(I paid $150 for it, and sold it 2 years later for $500).
    Anyway, there are some good things about beaters.

    -If someone dings you in a parking lot, who cares?
    -You never have to spend money on car washes
    -You don’t need wax, polish, clay bars, micro fibre cloths or anything like that.
    -If you spill your slushy on the seat, well, who cares?
    -There are no power windows, or locks, or any such exotic stuff to break
    -It gets 30 miles to the gallon(I have no clue how to convert that to l/100km)
    -you don’t have to worry about driving in the rain
    -or mud
    -or snow
    -the engine compartment doesn’t have to be squeaky clean
    -if one of my customers mentions the rust on it, I can proudly say that the car has cost me less in a year than one payment on their BMW, Audi, Lexus, or whatever
    -It has 4 doors, so I can actually take people with me (what will I do when I park it in the summer?)
    -It has a cup holder
    -somebody put a fancy stereo system in it somewhere along the line. 680 News sounds pretty good
    -I get to exercise control, and practice keeping one position of my right foot on the highway since I don’t have cruise control
    -I have learned how to drive and navigate through traffic with absolutely no guts at all under the hood.
    -I have learned to avoid full throttle, as the transmission drops out of gear if you floor it.
    - I have learned to see through the windows, even when they haven’t been cleaned in 5 years
    -One of the cars has no functioning air conditioning. I learned that you can drive with the windows down and it’s not so bad.
    -I have learned why so many people drive their cars so slowly around corners. The Shadow simply can’t hustle around without screeching the tires and wanting desperately to go straight.
    In fact, I may just keep these beasts for more than one winter!

    Update. In 2012 I bought an 03 Explorer for $1100.00. The guy was asking $1800 as is, (it had brand new tires on it), but I took a page out of "Gas Monkey" and offered him $1000 CASH. He dropped right then to $1100, to which I agreed. It had 220,000 km on it.
    I took it to my local mechanic, who charged me $700 to replace the brakes, a steering arm, a light bulb and change the oil. Including registration and license, the car stood me $2000.00 on the road.

    the little black 2-door explorer had working 4 wheel drive, an aftermarket stereo, power leather seats, and even a sunroof. Must have been a nice car when it was new. Unfortunately the A/c never worked, but since it didn't use it in summer that didn't matter. The 4 litre v-6 was a gutless wonder, and it got ridiculously poor fuel economy, but it always started. Never failed me.

    We drove that car for 4 years. Replaced air filter, changed the oil every 8000km, and spent $500 to replace a smashed back window. Between myself, my family, and two of my workers, we put 80,000 km on it !! in 4 years. I would have kept it but the frame was rusting and my mechanic refused to work on it any more since he felt it was unsafe.
    So. I put it on KIJIJI for $850 as is, and within 12 hours a wrecking yard was at my door with $600 cash. I was sad to see it go, as it was a comfortable companion and kinda, how can I put this, cute. In snowy weather, it was fantastic. Put it in 4wd and go anywhere.
    After all was said and done, it cost me $2400 including maintenance for 80,000 km and 4 years. $50/month!!

    recently, I bought another used car, my Jaguar. It's in a slightly different class, but it's still used. Let's hope it's just as reliable.
    1971 Avanti II, 2022 F250 4 dr diesel
    '89 Coupe, ,'F550 Dump
    '21 Bronco 4-door, 22 Mustang vert
    '18 Ecosport, 2018 F-55
    '17 F-250, 96 Mustang GT vert

  2. #2
    Club Supporter Laffs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Quicksilver View Post
    recently, I bought another used car, my Jaguar. It's in a slightly different class, but it's still used. Let's hope it's just as reliable.
    I'm a betting man, I'd like to take the under on this one.
    Quote Originally Posted by ludacris View Post
    I'm Supercharged with the HideAway License Plate

  3. #3
    Club Supporter 83 5.0's Avatar
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    The best winter beater we had ( if this qualifies) was my wifes 99 CrV which she replaced in 2011 with a VW Eos. My son drove it in college, my daughter in University, and this summer gave it to a buddy for a winter beater with 375000 on the odometer. In 2018, the wifes EOS timing chain tensioner broke, and grenaded the engine. Meanwhile the Honda just kept on. If it wasn't for the plastic body cladding held on with some silicone and spray foam, it would be a pretty ugly sight.

  4. #4
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    My current 'beater' has a heated steering wheel and I don't feel bad about that just one bit. It must be one of the BEST INVENTIONS EVER!

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armen View Post
    My current 'beater' has a heated steering wheel and I don't feel bad about that just one bit. It must be one of the BEST INVENTIONS EVER!
    wait till its 40 degrees and you turn on the ass coolers

  6. #6
    Posting and liking.... Ponyryd's Avatar
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    ^^You two have missed the point of this thread

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    I missed it too , skipped to the comments posts

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    Club Supporter hammerhead's Avatar
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    I don't mind trading paint either when the 410 gets like nascar and the dumbasses cant stay in their lanes while trying to negotiate a baby bank while texting...lol had another guy run right under my Tacoma with his Nissan Altima trying to cheat in rush hour and sneak behind my from the thru lane and into the left turn lane - one tire was up on his hood - I wasn't missing my advance light, put it low 4, drove down off the hood and made my green - it was late - it was snowing - I was hungry - fuck you! hahahah! who needs to go to the track when you can just go to Brampton.....lol
    1979 Pace Car 302 4spd
    1981 Cobra t-top option - power to be determined, in the works

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Armen View Post
    My current 'beater' has a heated steering wheel and I don't feel bad about that just one bit. It must be one of the BEST INVENTIONS EVER!
    Amen to that.
    1971 Avanti II, 2022 F250 4 dr diesel
    '89 Coupe, ,'F550 Dump
    '21 Bronco 4-door, 22 Mustang vert
    '18 Ecosport, 2018 F-55
    '17 F-250, 96 Mustang GT vert

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ponyryd View Post
    ^^You two have missed the point of this thread
    Heated steering wheel awesomeness laughs at this response.

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