Post up Good Jokes!

[ZR]

One weekend, a husband is in the bathroom shaving when the local kid Fred he hired to mow his lawn, comes in to pee. The husband slyly looks over and is shocked at how immensely endowed Fred is. He can't help himself, and asks Fred what his secret is. "Well," says Fred, "every night before I climb into bed with a girl, I whack my penis on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!" The husband was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night. So before climbing into bed with his wife, he took out his penis and whacked it three times on the bedpost. His wife, half-asleep, said, "Fred? Is that you?"

[Slope]

^^^F*ckin' rights!

LMAO!!!

[ZR]

Three words to ruin a man's ego. "Is it in?"

[ZR]

Why does it take one million sperm to fertilize one egg? They don't stop and ask for directions

[ZR]

Your Halloween costume came in the mail today. I opened it. It was a rooster mask and a bag of lollipops. Going as a c*ck sucker again!?

[KIDAGIN]

Prince Charles was driving around his mother's estate when he accidentally ran over her favorite dog, a Corgi, crushing it to a pulp.
He got out of his Range Rover and sat down on the grass totally distraught.
The whole world was against him and now his mother would go ballistic.
Suddenly he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground.
He dug it up, polished it and immediately a Genie appeared. .
"You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment, " said the Genie
"As a reward I shall grant you one wish."
"Well, " said the Prince, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this dog." .
They walk over to the splattered remains of the dog.
"Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" the Prince asked. .
The Genie carefully looked at the remains and shook his head.
"This body is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life.
Is there something else you would like?"
The Prince thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos.
"I was married to this beautiful woman called Diana," said Prince Charles, showing the genie the first photo.
"But now I love this woman called Camilla," and he showed the genie the second photo.
"You see Camilla isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make Camilla as beautiful as Diana?"
The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said,
"Let's have another look at the dog.

[ZR]

^^^ Hell yes. LOL

[KIDAGIN]

On a hot summer day, a redneck cowboy came riding into town on his horse with his
dog following. He tied the horse and dog under the shade of a tree and went into the
bar for a cold beer.
About 20 minutes later a policeman came into the bar and asked who owned the dog
tied under the tree. The redneck cowboy said that it was his.
The policeman said, "Your dog seems to be in heat."
The redneck cowboy replies, "No way dog's in heat; he's cool cause I got'im tied
under the shade of the tree.
The policeman says, "No! you don't understand; your dog needs to be bred."
No way", the redneck cowboys says, "dog don't need bread, he's not hungry,
cause I fed him beef jerky this mornin". Now the policeman gets mad and yells
out; "NO! You don't seem to understand, your dog wants to have sex!"
The redneck cowboy looks at him and says,
"Go ahead. I always wanted a police dog!"

[KIDAGIN]

[ZR]

LOL