Post whatever is on your mind!!

[Scrape]

This is very true. I will definitely not let the bully win in this case. They will lose a dedicated employee with over 15 years of experience now.

Of course there are favorites. Denial of this is denial of basic human nature. It happens in families, it happens in business. It happens everywhere.

We all want "fairness" but wanting doesn't make it true. Life isn't fair, and no one is coming to rescue you. The sooner you face this, the sooner you'll help yourself, unless you prefer wallowing in self pity.

Stress leave is a good time to seek alternatives. For the torturer it signals victory. The bully is always encouraged by a win.

[ChickenLips]

This is very true. I will definitely not let the bully win in this case. They will lose a dedicated employee with over 15 years of experience now.

Myself I would deploy all available countermeasures. I'll assume the bully isn't playing fair. I'd also anticipate a move to poison the well for your outside options. Count on any other employer checking in with the bully.

The menu of counter moves has greatly expanded with woke society. Myself I'd record everything, journal what isn't recorded, save all correspondence and any other "ammo" to use in court or as leverage. By the sounds of it I'd anticipate false or greatly exaggerated allegations against you. Why not plant false or questionable seeds for later use. Think corporate IED. Remember the boss confronting Durden scene from Fight Club?

Accusations of racism, bigotry or some other HR type bullshit seems like fair game. Tangling him up in true or false allegations will make any attempt at poisoning the well questionable or lack veracity with a new employer. In a street fight winning is more important than playing fair if you want to survive?

Someone needs to lose the fight, why should it be you?

[Laffs]

Myself I would deploy all available countermeasures. I'll assume the bully isn't playing fair. I'd also anticipate a move to poison the well for your outside options. Count on any other employer checking in with the bully.

The menu of counter moves has greatly expanded with woke society. Myself I'd record everything, journal what isn't recorded, save all correspondence and any other "ammo" to use in court or as leverage. By the sounds of it I'd anticipate false or greatly exaggerated allegations against you. Why not plant false or questionable seeds for later use. Think corporate IED. Remember the boss confronting Durden scene from Fight Club?

Accusations of racism, bigotry or some other HR type bullshit seems like fair game. Tangling him up in true or false allegations will make any attempt at poisoning the well questionable or lack veracity with a new employer. In a street fight winning is more important than playing fair if you want to survive?

Someone needs to lose the fight, why should it be you?

Don't do this.

[92redragtop]

Don't do this.

Yeah - take the high road and move on. Smear campaigns mean you'll end up with some on you.

[92redragtop]

Sadly, the first 4 were not noted. This one was a formal one in writing. Worse part is my boss who is an HR Manager forwarded the email to the person that berated me. I sent that email to him in confidence. I feel so violated. Seriously.

That's an HR no-no and tells you all you need to know about that individual and the culture they support - reaffirms the assessment to move-on to something that fits better. It's their loss.

[5.4MarkVIII]

Myself I would deploy all available countermeasures. I'll assume the bully isn't playing fair. I'd also anticipate a move to poison the well for your outside options. Count on any other employer checking in with the bully.

The menu of counter moves has greatly expanded with woke society. Myself I'd record everything, journal what isn't recorded, save all correspondence and any other "ammo" to use in court or as leverage. By the sounds of it I'd anticipate false or greatly exaggerated allegations against you. Why not plant false or questionable seeds for later use. Think corporate IED. Remember the boss confronting Durden scene from Fight Club?

Accusations of racism, bigotry or some other HR type bullshit seems like fair game. Tangling him up in true or false allegations will make any attempt at poisoning the well questionable or lack veracity with a new employer. In a street fight winning is more important than playing fair if you want to survive?

Someone needs to lose the fight, why should it be you?

not the path to take. someone has to take the moral route. anything else turns into a "he said she said" and no one comes out of that good in the end.

for me I had months of documentation. journals work orders, recorded conversations. the lawyer told me that in the end, you dont know that they have and no guarantee of a legal win. if your lucky you might win enough to cover legal fees.


in the end you have to do what is best for you. take some time do things you enjoy forget about the crap and garbage and work bs even if just for a week or two. take an impromptu vacation or just dive the country side. think to the future and only make major directions when you can remove the feeling and think rationally about it.

[ChickenLips]

Don't do this.

All I'm suggesting is that there's more options than simply playing fair. It's not an all or nothing strategy, but there are more than one option. Boss isn't playing fair.

I've been on the brink of going nuclear a few times, but have not pushed the button. Simply knowing and being prepared are often enough of a mindset shift to remove fear.

Being prepared and not using it is better than being unprepared and eating it.

[Zippy]

+1 on walking away from a Toxic environment. I just walked away from a race team I was with as I felt I was being belittled and talked down to.
Life is too short to put up with that sort of stuff.
Do what makes sense to you and move on.

[RedSN]

I was just let go from my job a few weeks ago. Me and another engineer, same day. Since then, a draftsman (the only draftsman) left, another engineer/PM left, and another engineer/PM got terminated yesterday. That’s 5 in less than a month. In an engineering department of only 10. A toxic family owned steel fabrication company.

[5.4MarkVIII]

I was just let go from my job a few weeks ago. Me and another engineer, same day. Since then, a draftsman (the only draftsman) left, another engineer/PM left, and another engineer/PM got terminated yesterday. That’s 5 in less than a month. In an engineering department of only 10. A toxic family owned steel fabrication company.

Sorry to here. If I recall You weren’t there long. Seem to remember the move early in covid.

Hope there are lots of prospects for you with less BS